After discovering a chatroom online for people with DID, I was inspired to go out and buy my own copy of “When Rabbit Howls.” I started reading it and realized that I had already read some of it before. I skipped ahead a bit and started reading again. I read a whole chapter and then realized I already knew what happened in the next chapter. So I skipped ahead again. I guess I’m a little over halfway through. Maybe after I’m done I’ll go back and re-read it just to be sure I actually read it all.
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Forward
– by Matthew
We are in motion towards the shaft of light breaking through the clouds. It isn’t the destination that’s important, but the fact that we are journeying together. This landscape is malleable and shifts on strange winds. As we walk through the tall grass, our home moves along with us, tethered to my footsteps.
Taran is silent, but eager. I see his eyes light up as we clear the top of each hill, anxious to see what lies ahead. The younger one rides the Guardian of the Heart and his joy is infectious. The other, less solid members of our company flicker about us like lights in a mist. Below the roots of earth, I sense the dark cavern being dragged along behind us, the tripartite being refusing to acknowledge that any journey is taking place.
That is all I wish to say at this time, thank you.
Tongue
I stole the man’s tongue, but I didn’t know he was crazy.
I’ve got to get it back to him before I start believing what it’s telling me.
The tongue, I mean —
It sits there on the back of the toilet next to the Kleenex box
and judges me.
It tells me that if I don’t floss every single day,
the love of my life will NOT reach for the same book as I do
and we won’t meet at the library, or anywhere else.
When I wake up in the morning,
there is a wet spot on my pillow,
a slug-like saliva trail.
Yet the tongue is still perched on the toilet.
It comments on my choice of clothing,
flopping around, spattering spit.
It says I must not think much of myself
to dress the way I do.
When I get back from work,
I find the keyboard and mouse covered in a pasty white film.
My in-box is full of outraged responses.
I’ve got to give it back,
but I know the man it going to slit my throat if he finds out
where his tongue has been!
No, I better just keep it.
I better…no, no it’s too awful.
But I must.
I better eat it.
Cathy
Start dating Cathy.
I have a premonition that we will get married, but it will end in disaster. I didn’t care.
Dichotomy
The mood provokes writing. The dark steaminess of the bar envelopes me like I’m wearing a soaking wet trenchcoat. I’m smoking because it gives me a sense of adding something physical to the atmosphere; it is my aura. I sit there, looking through the wall, the scene, everything, and I think about ordering a drink. Something with a bite. Something that will make the bartender raise an eyebrow and the patrons turn their heads with my favorite mixture of disgust and respect. Continue reading →
Grey
I stood there in the emptiness of my mind and summoned Grey. He appeared suddenly, a group of shadows coming together to take shape. He looked a lot like me, but in a more ideal fashion. He wore my trenchcoat and the skeleton shirt. He looked at me with his cold grey eyes. Continue reading →
Chapter 2
“What is the symbolism in the spider?” asked the girl.
Grey looked up from where he was sitting on the floor of the apartment.
“What?!” he asked, puzzled and shocked.
“Does the spider has some hidden meaning to it?” she elaborated. “I mean,
everything else always has: the Iron Tower, the chasms, you know.”
“That was a different place and a different time,” explained Grey. “The
only significance of the spider is that it really freaked me out, that’s all.
Why do you always have to be looking for ‘hidden meanings’ and ‘deep sig
nificance’ im every little thing?”
“Sorry,” she apologized insincerely. “I guess I’m just so used to it!”
Grey endured a few seconds of her scornful gaze before looking away. He
scanned the apartment again. Nothing much here; ruined furniture, the window
they came in and the door leading out. They would probably go through the door
pretty soon.
“Grey,” she said. “Why did you bring me along with you?”
Chapter 1
Hey, here is the story
Forget about the trouble in life
Don’t you know it’s not easy
When you gotta walk upon that line
A dark alley where only shadows chose to dwell…
Scraps of paper and assorted refuse blew about on the gusty winds. Several
rats foraged for sustenance in others’ discarded waste. The sudden appearance
of a mangy tomcat sent the rats scurrying for their burrows. Licking its paws,
the cat reflected on its loss of a meal.
A brilliant blue line of light cut across the fabric of reality in that
back alley. The line hovered above the ground for a few moments before expand
ing upward into a glowing rectangular portal.
And two came through from the other side…
The cat screeched at the appearance of the boy and the girl and then ran at
full speed to safer hunting grounds.
The boy wrapped his trenchcoat closer to his body as the air was much
cooler here. The girl stood staring at their surroundings, taking in this new
scene. She had seen many wonders in the other place, and it was strange for
her to see something that could be called anything close to normal or sane.
Her gaze returned the boy and found that he looked a little different than
before; he had changed again.
“Who are you this time?” she asked nonchalantly.
“Name’s Grey.” he replied with a smirk.
“Why are you called ‘Grey’ here?”
“Because I am.” he answered simply, offering no explanation. The girl
decided to leave it at that and move on to another topic.
“How come you change and I don’t?”
“Who says you haven’t changed?” he said. “You have, but you just didn’t
notice it.” His eyes wandered, inspecting the alley.
“What do you mean…” she started to say, but was stopped short as she
caught her reflection in a plane of glass. “I..I’m beautiful!”
“You’ve always been beautiful…” said Grey.
“No, I mean, awesome beautiful! I mean, BETTER!”
“Yeah, I guess that we are both in an ‘ideal state’.” Grey stood there,
whistling a soft tune as the girl examined herself up and down. He was rather
annoyed, for he was used to such things and he wanted to get on with every
thing.
But just what was everything? Why were they here, anyway? He had to for
cibly hold down a cold fear that threatened to freeze his heart. He would have
to hide his ignorance from the girl; wouldn’t want to frighten her.
“Hey,” said the girl suddenly. “Where is she? Didn’t she come through with
us?” She looked back at the door, but found only a brick wall. The portal had
closed and vanished.
“She took a different path, hon.” Grey explained matter-of-factly.
“Oh.” she said, nodding her head. A tinge of regret and sadness chanced to
enter her heart, but was quickly ushered out as an intruder.
“Take it easy. Don’t worry about it.” he said, patting her shoulder, reas
suringly.
She looked up at him and caught his gaze.
“I’m fine.” she assured him in a steel tone.
“Of course you are.” He looked away from her and diverted his eyes to a
rusty fire escape above them. “Let’s get out of here.”
“Where are we going?” she asked.
“Up.” With that, he made a springing leap to the spring-hinged ladder
several feet above. He caught onto it and rode it down until it was fully ex
tended. He clambered up to the landing platform and the ladder folded back up
with a clash.
“Come on up,” he said.
“What?” she asked, amazed. “How am I supposed to get up there? I can’t
jump up there, like you! Really, you ask too much of me, Grey.”
“Well fine,” he replied. “Just find your own way up.” He secretly wondered
if he was going to have to help her and whether she would let him.
The girl looked around the dead-end alley and spotted the cluster of gar
bage cans. She walked over to them and dragged the sturdiest one over so that
it was just underneath the ladder. Climbing upon this, she was able to reach
the ladder and climb up.
“Bravo,” yawned Grey.
“Shut up,” said the girl.
“I don’t think we should be in here,” said the girl, looking around the
dark apartment.
“Who’s gonna care?” asked Grey rhetorically. He kicked at an overturned
table and it fell apart. “It looks like no one’s been in here for ages.”
“Well I still think you didn’t need to break the window.”
“It was stuck…” Glass crunched under his steps as he walked over to the
wall and examined a dusty picture.
“Eww,” muttered the girl. “There’s a spider on your back.”
Grey spun around, eyes wild.
“What? Get it off!!”
“Well, I’m not going to touch it…”
“Aughhh! Get it off meee!”
The girl watched in amused silence as Grey danced about for a while, swat
ting at his back before taking off his trenchcoat. The large, hairy arachnid
scuttled off of the coat and was crushed by Grey’s boot.
“Ugh,” he said in disgust. “Damn, I hate spiders.” He collected his coat,
examining it for any other creatures before putting it back on.
“What’s so funny?!” he demanded, seeing the slight smirk on the girl’s
face.
“Nothing,” she replied, stifling a snicker.
TO BE CONTINUED…
Life and How We Dealt with It
A comic tragedy presented as a trilogy
To be published in the Afterlife Continue reading →
Interlude
The shadow of the boy had almost etched itself into the cracked ground, so long had he sat unmoving. Again he pondered the meaning of life and his role in it. He gazed upon this land of living metaphors – fictional creations that were more solid than reality. This reality, his reality, was not real either and he knew it. It was all under his control here. But here and here only, don’t you forget it. Continue reading →